What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?

Romans: 8:31-32

Once again, the tumor is stable...with possibly a little bit of shrinkage!!! : ) The two of us have had a fabulous day. It's always nice to take a break from work and spend the day together, even if it's spent driving and waiting in doctor's offices. There's so much I want to share, but I'll try to stick to the good stuff.

After my MRI, we met with my radiation oncologist. He's always been so good about showing us the scans and he always pulls up an image from today with the exact image from 5 months ago. He walks us through it, explaining the details. Before he showed them to us, he shared that they looked good and it possibly looks slightly smaller. He explained that this could be because of the different machine they used today, how I was situated, or foods I had eaten. However, he went on to show us, and beaming, he said he was very pleased with how they looked. Zac and I are obviously no doctors, but with our own eyes we could definitely see that it was smaller! And the fact that it has continued to shrink even 2 years after treatment is even more amazing!!

I'm sure many of you have had an MRI done for various reasons. Many people usually say they can't stand them. They hate the noise or hate being in a tight area where they can't move. Well I'm one of those strange people who actually doesn't mind them. It's actually a time when I'm forced to just lay still and relax, which I rarely do at home. Even though there's an annoying and loud buzzing and hammering around me, it's somehow quiet for me. I'm able to just turn my complete attention to God and pray for 30 minutes. And I love it! I recently did a bible study on the book of Daniel. At one point, Daniel explains a time when he was praying and an angel of the Lord came to him. He says, "While I was speaking and praying, confessing my sin...and making my request to the LORD my God...while I was still in prayer, Gabriel...came to me...and said to me..."As soon as you began to pray, an answer was given, which I have come to tell you."" (sorry for the paraphrase!). That was my prayer today - that as I was still praying, as the MRI was being done, that God would answer us. And he did! Bit by bit, this tumor is getting smaller and we are so thankful for what the Lord has done for us and through us.

I mentioned yesterday that this would be my last post. It makes me sad, because I've enjoyed writing on here so much. We know that since the tumor's still there, something could still happen, but for the last year and a half, I have felt great and don't have too much to report. Zac and I are ready to move on and see what God has next for us. But before that, I have a bit more to share that's been my heart.

Like I mentioned, I just finished a study on Daniel (which contains prophesy or things to come). Through this study, along with sermons at church, a book our bible study has been reading and other messages I've heard recently, I've felt this great need to share what I know about Christ. In my Daniel study, we studied what will happen to all of us when we die or when Christ returns to earth, whichever comes first. It absolutely frightens me to think what will happen to those who have not placed their trust in Jesus Christ.

Over the past 4 1/2 years, I've had fear from my diagnosis - but it was always fear of dying young, of leaving my husband, my family and loved ones behind. But I never had fear of where I would go once I died. In college, I recognized that I was sinful, and I recognized that my only way to eternal life, is through placing my trust in Christ. He died on the cross as a sacrifice for me, for my sins. I asked Christ to forgive me and because of him, I can now stand before the throne of God, in confidence and one day I will live forever!

I always thought I'd go to heaven because I went to a Christian church, and celebrated Christmas and Easter. But I was missing it all entirely. I had to understand what Easter stood for. I had to recognize that Jesus died on the cross that day to pay for our sins. And I had to fall on my knees, ask him for forgiveness, and ask him to live in my heart. And I developed a personal relationship with him. I've found the greatest joy and peace in my relationship with Christ. And I hope and pray you have too.

Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Philippians 1:6

I'm pretty sure no one's still checking this, considering the last time we posted was at Christmas-time. However, just at the odd chance that one person out there is still reading, we thought we'd add an update. Zac and I are heading to Iowa City in the morning for a five month checkup. We'll be sure to post again tomorrow night...and then I think it's time to wrap up our blog. Although we've been through ups and downs over the past couple years, it's been fun sharing on here what God is doing in our life.

We don't anticipate any changes tomorrow - I've been feeling great - better than I have in a couple of years. I really can't remember the last headache I've had. About a week ago, I started having strange, minor pains in my head one day. I panicked for a slight moment and then remembered the verse that got me through every day of treatment: "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" Philippians 4:4-7. When I was first diagnosed, I had a friend (through my sister, Angie) who told me that often times she'd get these pains in her head and it was her reminder to pray for me. So when it happened to me last week, after I got rid of the original fear, it reminded me to pray for two special people - one is a 5 year old girl who has a similar brain tumor and was returning last week for a check-up and the other was a friend about my age who was recently diagnosed with breast cancer, just month before her wedding day (much like Zac and I). She happened to be starting radiation last week when these pains happened. I turned my prayers from my own irrational fears, to prayers for these two...and by the end of the day, the pain had disappeared and they both are doing well! God is so good!

Thank you so much for YOUR prayers. Like I said, I'll write one last time tomorrow night, sharing news of our appointment, as well as something that's been on my heart the past few months. God bless.