Psalm 73

Psalm 73:21-28

When my heart was grieved
and my spirit embittered,
I was senseless and ignorant;
I was a brute beast before you.

Yet I am always with you;
You hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Those who are far from you will perish;
you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have made the Sovereign Lord my refuge;
I will tell of all your deeds.

We're Back!

For those of you still reading this, I'm so sorry for neglecting this lately. I think I've been avoiding it because I don't always like to face what I'm going through. : ) But I'm finally back and just wanted to give an update. Since my last post, I met with one of my doctor's and talked to my neurologist again on the phone for some follow-up questions. I was able to get some things answered and felt some peace after talking with both.

One question we had was why am I noticing changes if the MRI is showing no change. My neurologist explained again that their ability to measure with the MRI is not as good as my ability to feel. They believe the tumor is growing, it's just at such a small rate that they can't measure it with the MRI. We've known this all along, it's just something we need to remind ourselves of. He also met with my radiation oncologist and they are both on the same page now and believe that I should continue doing what I'm doing and wait until absolutely necessary to go through treatment.

We continue to do more research and are looking at setting up more appointments in the future. We also continue to just take one day at a time and wait patiently on God. That's all any of us can do. Continue to pray for peace to know when/if to go through treatment, which can shrink the tumor, but can also damage the healthy nerves that control vision, hearing, balance, etc.

No Change

We had the doctor appointments today and learned that once again there is no noticible growth in the size of the tumor. We're praising God that it hasn't changed since last time.

We're not sure what's next. I'm feeling sort of frustrated because I'm noticing changes in my body - mainly my eyesight and hearing. I've been leaning towards starting treatment but just wanted to get through today's appointments first. I'm planning on setting up an app't with my family dr and radiation oncologist to get some more questions answered.

Thank you so much for all of your prayers. We couldn't get through this without God's strength and the prayers of all of you. Please continue to pray for wisdom and peace in things to come.

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer" Romans 12:12

I've finally set up the appointments for my 6 month checkup. This Wednesday, Feb 25 I will have my MRI and then will meet with my neurologist to go over the results. The MRI will show if the tumor has grown significantly or not. Based off the other appointments over the last two years we don't think it's growing by a lot (but they say it's growing slowly). However, over the past few months I've noticed changes in my body, leading me to believe that it may be time to go through treatment. My eyesight has definetely changed lately. I started noticing double vision awhile back and lately it has clearly gotten worse and I'm having to wear my glasses more. I don't have much hearing left in my right ear. I normally can hear fine when I'm with a small group of people but in large crowds I'm having troubles hearing clearly - I usually hear sounds, not clear words. Looking through pictures I can also see that my face is changing more. The tumor is hitting nerves that is creating what the doctor's call facial weakness. Migraines have not been a huge issue lately, but I sometimes have pains in my head that last a few seconds where it feels like someone is squeezing my brain...not fun!!

There have definetely been lots of good days with the bad. We are praising God daily for each day he gives us. We are still trusting and believing in a miracle and know that it will be in His time. The doctor's have said that radiation will not take away the tumor, it will only shrink it. But we continue to praise and believe in our big and powerful God.

I will extol the Lord at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.
My soul will boast in the Lord;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.
Glorify the Lord with me;
let us exalt his name together.
I sought the Lord, and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears.
Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.
This poor man called and the Lord heard him;
he saved him out of all his troubles.
The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.
Taste and see that the Lord is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him. (Psalm 34:1-8)

Please be praying for us this week and we will be sure to keep you updated after Wednesday. God's blessings!!

Update

For those of you checking this, sorry I haven't posted sooner. I know the last time I wrote I said I'd be setting up my appointments very soon. I'm still not sure when they are. I called my doctor this week and am waiting for a call back this week to get things finalized. I will hopefully have more soon. The MRI and 6 month check up will be in the next few weeks.

Stacie