ONE YEAR!!

I waited patiently for the LORD;

he turned to me and heard my cry.

He lifted me out of the slimy pit,

out of the mud and mire;

he set my feet on a rock

and gave me a firm place to stand.

He put a new song in my mouth,

a hymn of praise to our God.

Many will see and fear

and put their trust in the LORD.

Psalm 40 1-3

It's so hard to believe that it's been a full year since going through treatment already! I remember when I started on June 15, 2009 thinking it was going to be the longest 6 weeks of my life. And then thinking - who knows what the outcome will even be from this? Where will I be in one year? Will this even be worth it since treatment is not a cure? Twelve months later and it was definitely worth it. I am feeling absolutely great! I am doing things that were not possible for me over a year ago. I remember the first time I ran this spring (I'm not a runner, I just ran across the street!) and it was the best feeling in the world. Before treatment, that would have sent me to the ground in pain. I've also had fun times this summer with my nieces and nephews - chasing after them, diving headfirst into a slip-n-slide with Kate, jumping on a trampoline. I guess after living like a 90 year old last summer, I've decided to live like a kid this summer. Why not? God is good - He has put a new song in my mouth!

There have been other changes over the course of the year. Last summer I spent my time hiding my bald spots. This summer I spend my time straightening my new hair. They told me my hair would probably grow in differently, and that it did! I would love curly hair - if it ALL was curly. But it's only in the spots where they treated me! Oh well, bigger things to worry about. Last summer I wanted people to speak up so I could hear them clearly. This summer there are some people that I wouldn't mind if they were a little more quiet! (Just kidding!)

It's now time to head back to Iowa City for a 5 month checkup. We're heading over this Monday, June 19. Please pray for a great report. As I continue to feel better each day, we pray that the tumor will shrink each day. Each time I've returned for a checkup over the year, they have been unable to tell me that the tumor is noticeably smaller. We boldly pray that this time we will hear those words - that the tumor has indeed shrunk. Please, please, please pray for this with us!

Please also continue to pray for healing of my eyes. Although my vision has improved, there is still more needed. My eyes probably give me the most trouble of all. They burn often throughout the day and eye drops haven't seemed to help. Pray also for increased strength in my facial muscles. Again, we have seen slight improvements but there is definitely more needed. These are probably the top two side effects from this tumor, but the column on the left has more things to continue praying for.

We'll be sure to let you know how Monday goes. And for my very few faithful followers of this blog, sorry for no new updates in such a long time. I guess we've just been too busy enjoying life to spend it on the internet. However, when I logged in to write tonight, I realized how much I missed this - being able to share what God is doing through this journey. About the only thing from last summer that I actually miss I guess!

Finally - an update!

Praise the LORD.

Praise the LORD, O my soul. I will praise the LORD all my life; I will sing praise to my God as long as I live.

Psalm 146:1-2

It's amazing to think that it's been a full 3 years since I was first diagnosed with a brain tumor. And even crazier to think that I've probably had the tumor for 13+ years! God has definitely taken care of me during these years and He encouraged us this past week during my appointments.

After bloodwork and the MRI, we met with my oncologist and radiation oncologist. In the past 3 years, these 2 appointments have been the most encouraging. The tumor remains stable, which is what the doctors were hoping for. At most appointments we've had, the doctors have hinted at a shorter life for me. But last Monday, my oncologist said that there is no reason why I shouldn't be able to live a long life. He explained that the brain takes a really long time to heal. The damage from the tumor and from treatment, may just take a really long time to heal. And we've already seen tremendous healing (some vision and hearing improvements), so there could definitely be more on the way!

I think some people thought we were crazy for waiting 2 1/2 years to start treatment. But we know that this is exactly where God wanted us. There have been the little things - like having lodging provided for us in Iowa City this past summer by the Hope Lodge, which opened in October 2008. If we had gone through treatment 3 years ago, we would have been staying in a depressing hotel room. Besides this, and other small things, there were the big things - like the treatment I received. The knowledge and wisdom of doctors has expanded and the treatment I got was different than it would have been 3 years ago. I now have the opportunity to receive chemotherapy again down the road if needed, whereas 3 years ago, that would not have been an option. I could continue, but just know there were many blessings along this journey.

So often, when faced with bad news, all we see is the negative. But "we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him." (Romans 8:28). 3 years ago, sitting in my doctors office, having just been told I have a brain tumor, all I could see was the negative. But along the way, we have seen God provide so much good in this. We are thankful for this positive check-up and won't have to return to Iowa City for another 4 months!

3 Month Check-up

A man with leprosy came to him and begged him on his knees, "If you are willing, you can make me clean." Filled with compassion, Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. "I am willing," he said. "Be clean!" Immediately the leprosy left him and he was cured. Mark 1:40-42

Zac and I are off to Iowa City Monday morning for a 3 month MRI and appointments with my oncologist and radiation oncologist. These 3 months have flown by and they've been filled with many blessings along the way. My hair has grown back in, my taste buds have already been restored (they said it could take 6-12 months and it took 5!), my hearing and vision have both slightly improved, and there have been no head "pains" (with only a couple minor headaches). God is so good!

Please pray with us for a great report tomorrow. We know that God has the power to heal me, but we pray that it is God's will to heal me. We continue to boldly ask, with confidence, for this healing.

We may not be able to update the website with tomorrow's results until Thursday. But we'll get something posted as soon as we can.

The Mask is Back

Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.

Psalm 100:1-3

A few months ago, we had a blog where we asked for suggestions on what to do with my radiation mask. http://zacandstacie.blogspot.com/2009/08/mask.html. We were given some great ideas and being that today is yet another snow day here in Des Moines, we decided to finally finish working on it.

For those of you who think it's a bit strange to play around with a radiation mask, please understand that it has been healing for me. In the 3 years since being diagnosed, Zac and I have tried our best to find the good in all situations. This isn't what we would have chosen for our life, but it's what happened, so the only thing we have control over is our attitude. And we choose to laugh and have fun with life. This mask represents 5 weeks of my life that was very rough but throughout every moment we felt God's Hand of protection over my body. This mask may have been vital during treatment, but we know God ultimately protected.

I have one final thing planned for my mask and will post that in the next month when it's finished. But for now, are you ready for some fun? Please laugh with us as you look through our photos. : )

We started back in October and I dressed up to scare all the neighborhood kids for trick-or-treat night. There were some tears from Spiderman and Cinderella so I took it off and used it as our "treat" bowl. *

At Christmas time, we tried using it as our star on the tree. Although I'm not much of a decorator, I knew it didn't quite look right so we replaced it with a real star. When making supper I sometimes use it to strain my pasta. (Don't tell Zac!) **

It comes in handy as a very decorative nightlight cover.

We've been able to practice our putting indoors this winter.

We tried using it as a cover for our porch light, but realized my head is not big enough - Thank God!!! : )
In answer to does it "Sink or Float"....It sinks!

*No children were scared or harmed in this experiment.
**This pasta was not consumed. That's just plain wrong!!

Glory to God in the Highest

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the LORD. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger." Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

Many of you may not have known, but Zac and I traveled to Iowa City for a couple appointments and tests on Wednesday. My oncologists wanted an update on my vision following treatment and also wanted me to meet with a head and neck specialist to address my hearing and also a couple small issues I've had over recent months. Although it does not match the glorious news the angels brought years ago (but nothing can compare to the birth of our Savior), we did have a little good news ourselves yesterday.

I started out with a hearing test. After testing, they are not concerned about my hearing at this point. Although the UofI did not test my hearing in June before treatment, I did have it tested here in Des Moines a year ago and it has slightly improved! As one doctor pointed out, I am very blessed to have full hearing in my left ear and only mild problems in my right. We then met with the head and neck surgeon. He addressed the atrophy I have in my face or the little control I have over the muscles in my face. He said it's amazing that I still have control over the muscles around my eyes (I'd say it's God protecting me!).

We were then off to the neuro-ophthalmologist. They ran many tests and took lots of photos. And in the end we received the good news that my vision and double vision has improved slightly. Some of you may know that on my glasses (used only for distances and driving), I have a prism. It's like a clear sticker on my glasses that helps the double vision. The doctors told me yesterday that I can try going without the prism for now!

Zac and I had a great day as it was encouraging to hear the news that there is slight improvement. There have been many times over the past few years that I feel so sorry for myself that I can't hear clearly at all times and have to deal with the double vision. But different things throughout the day reminded me that I am so incredibly blessed. I can still hear and see and it could always be worse. I also recognize that my healing is going to be slow. But we rejoice each day in the little blessings and improvements.

As we enter into the Christmas season, may we all remember the reason for celebrating - The great and glorious news that God sent His Son, Christ, to earth. He was born a baby and one day He made the ultimate sacrifice for us. "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."